Name: Sam Tucker
Nickname: Tucker
Height: 5′ 10″, plays like 5′ 5″
Weight: 180
Bra Size: Goldberg
Favorite Position: Left of the dealer
Favorite Republican: Jack Donaghy
Favorite GoP Alums: Rob Atlas and David Schmidt
Favorite CUTboy: Justin/Simon
Favorite Syzygite: Laura Karson
Favorite Eclipser: Katie Benson
Favorite Drink: FresKa
Bowling High Score: Over 250 on candystand back in middle school.
Personal Achievements: Forcing a (4 way) draw in Diplomacy with only one piece left. I forced England to keep me alive to hold a stalemate line on in the Mediterranean and through Scandinavia. 0->Death comboing Pete Berg in Smash Bros.
Favorite Quote: “When will modern science find a cure for a woman’s mouth.”
Favorite Real Sport: Koob
Number of 12 year olds you realistically think you could beat up at once: With higher ground, 8 or 9.
Dumbest thing you’ve ever done (other than playing for GOP): Telling Nate that if the Red Scare were made up of zombies, it would be the Dead Scare.
Personal Anecdote: I had a similar experience to that of the cockroach in Kafka’s Metamorphosis… except I turned into a butterfly. One of those really frilly and flamboyant ones.