John on Trike

Name: John Moore Heydinger

Favorite Position: Alabama Crab Dangle

Favorite Republican: Honest Abe

Favorite Eclipser: My sister

Bowling High Score: 181

Favorite Quote: “100% of the time it works everytime.” – Yui

Favorite Real Sport: Flip Cup

Number of 12 year olds you realistically think you could beat up at once: 7 – I figure I get the the first two who come at me, no problem, their done. After that there are a lot of swinging limbs and biting teeth to deal with. The last five would have to be taken out systematically. I think that eight kid is able to get me in the nuts (how did they know my weakness?!?) and then I’m down on their level and all bets are off. However, never underestimate my ability to fight with the ferocity of a cornered badger if the need arises.

Favorite YouTube video: London Ukelele Orchestra Plays “Smells Like Teen Spirit”

World Cup

Extra: WOOOHOOOO! I like the REDSOX! It says so on my forehead!