When I look back on the final years of high school of my son, Warren, a current freshman at Carleton, it is a blur. So much was packed in, including squeezing in several college trips where we visited all sorts of schools in lots of different places to try to get a feel for what would suit my son best. Carleton happened to be one of the last schools we visited, and Warren knew it was the school for him before we left for home.
He liked so much about Carleton — he could major in what he wanted to study (Computer Science) in the context of a strong liberal arts program, he sensed the warmth and engagement of the Carleton community, and, as the icing on the cake, he could be part of the swim team. He applied, and was accepted, in the first round of early decision for the class of 2027. It was so nice having that decision made. We then were able to turn our attention to the rest of his senior year and to preparing him to leave home in the fall. That acceptance felt like the happy ending to the long, and at times arduous, process of college admissions. I now realize that it was just the start of a momentous next step in his life.
Warren is our first-born child, so, while we knew he’d be heading off to college, it was more of an abstraction. I was so busy with the day-to-day that I didn’t really let myself think about what walking by his empty bedroom would feel like. A close friend told me that when her son went away to college many years ago, she did it all wrong. She made it all about herself and how much she would miss him. What she should have said, she told me, was “you’ve got this, I believe in you.” While both kinds of feelings were true for me, I tried to stress the latter as we packed his bags last summer and made our way to Minnesota.
My husband and I felt that communication from Carleton from the time our son was accepted until we dropped him off on move-in day was absolutely on point. We were neither bombarded with information nor left with unanswered questions. Checklists of to-dos and deadlines (not that there were too many of them) for enrolling students were helpful and clear. The thoughtful, relevant communication calmed our minds as we prepared for September, because we felt like nothing was slipping through the cracks.
I remember move-in day so vividly. We were staying at a local hotel, and the breakfast room was filled with parents and anxious looking young adults. One interesting fact we were told about the Carleton class of 2027 is that there were a total of 545 students from 433 different schools. What this means is that most kids come to Carleton not knowing anyone from their high school graduating class. This might make for butterflies on the morning of move-in day, but it also allows for so much growth, as students are drawn out of the comfort of the familiar to make deep connections with their classmates. And what wonderful classmates they are — interesting, authentic, intellectually curious students from around the country and around the world. We couldn’t ask for a better peer group for our son.
From my perspective, Carleton’s process of welcoming my son and his classmates to campus was thoughtful and focused on the well-being of its students. Carleton is known for its community of kind, engaged learners, and, while I am sure some magic is involved, there is also intention at play that we witnessed throughout orientation. Move-in day was busy, exciting and a bit exhausting. There were student-athletes there to help unload cars and move into dorms, there were students stationed all over campus ready to give directions and answer questions, and there were tubs of ice water — lots of ice water! Our move-in day was uncharacteristically warm.
The day culminated with President Byerly emceeing the famous freshman frisbee toss, at which point there were hugs, goodbyes and maybe a few tears, as our children launched themselves into their Carleton journey. The new students were kept very busy that first week, which meant that they had no choice but to engage with each other and their new environment. My son was part of several small groups — his orientation group, his RA group in his residence hall, and his sports team — that helped him feel at home right away.
We have visited a lot of college towns, and we think that Northfield is a gem. Downtown Northfield, with its cute coffee shops, indie bookstore, bike shops, and great restaurants, is right at Carleton’s doorstep. I’m sure that it is no surprise that I loved coming to campus and seeing my son last fall on Parents’ Weekend. I also love visiting Northfield, which is an added plus.
If you are reading this, you are probably in the middle of the whirlwind that is senior year of high school. If your child has been accepted in one of the early decision rounds, congratulations! He or she is heading to a very special place. If our experience is any guide, a year from now your child will feel a strong sense of belonging at Carleton, and when you walk by that empty bedroom your sadness will be tempered by the knowledge that your child is thriving in college. If you are still deciding, please do not hesitate to reach out to me or any of the other parents in the “Connect with a Current Parent” portion of the website. We welcome your questions and would be happy to share our experiences to help you with your decision.
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