As I have been visiting holy sites in Rome and in the surrounding area, I have been approaching them in three different ways, as a student, as a tourist, and as a religious pilgrim. Being on a Carleton program makes me approach the churches we visit with a particular analytical perspective, making sure to take thorough notes on the things that we see. However this functions as a way to record the interesting things I see through a tourist lens, as well as any devotional value I get from the religious art that I see. Where I see these different identities create an unfortunate juxtaposition are places that are both major tourist sites and religious sites, such as St. Peter’s Basilica in Vatican City.
When I first entered the church, I was immediately overwhelmed as a tourist and as a pilgrim. The churches on this trip that have been full of people loudly talking and taking pictures are tainted for me, with the lack of respect for the holy space, and this was true to the greatest extent at St. Peter’s. The Basilica itself is gigantic, with extremely high ceilings and very long aisles, with such a large amount of expensive art that it is almost too much. It didn’t really feel like a church to me, with only a few people treating it like a holy space. I couldn’t even really appreciate the art, such as the Pietà, because of all of the extra stimulation, and because of the sheer quantity of it, and I also felt uncomfortable taking pictures.
I noticed singing, and I thought that it was just a recording, but it turned out to be from a service that was processing around the church and stopping for the Stations of the Cross. When I joined this service with another student, my perception of the space began to slowly change, even as people were taking photos of the procession, which I found to be very inappropriate. Once the service concluded, we participated in the mass, and that was a very special experience. As the mass continued, the sanctuary had less and less people, with seemingly everyone left either participating in the service, or again taking pictures.
Once the service was over, the space was completely different to me. It finally felt holy, with its long and mostly empty galleries, and as much silence as could be expected from such a resonant space. The arc of my experience in St. Peter’s Basilica went from curious student to overwhelmed tourist to content pilgrim.