What type of English major are you? (Nityasya Belapurkar, ’15)
How do you like to drink your coffee?
a.) I harvest the beans myself.
b.) I don’t care – as long as the beans are fair trade.
c.) To-go. I always have somewhere to be.
d.) I empty the cup but somehow it fails to fill me.
What kind of literature do you like the most?
a.) Nutrition panels on the backs of cereal boxes. Literature is everywhere.
b.) Sylvia Plath and I were on a first name basis back in the day.
c.) I’m very well read. I might even claim to be a modern Hemingway.
d.) Last summer I travelled around Denmark in the footsteps of Kierkegaard.
Where’s your favourite place to study?
a.) I like studying in unconventional places – for instance, the bathtub.
b.) It pains me to be receiving such a good education when so many others are deprived of one.
c.) I have claimed a table on third libe. Stay away from it.
d.) Why study?
What’s one piece of clothing you couldn’t do without?
a.) I wear a bowl as a hat. It’s my prized possession.
b.) My collection of plaid shirts
c.) Well I have perfect vision…but I still wear glasses
d.) Clothes don’t matter to me. Nothing matters.
What’s your writing instrument of choice?
a.) Typewriters. I don’t believe in modern technology.
b.) I never leave home without my moleskin diary.
c.) I have the latest version of the MacBook pro. I like to be up-to-date
d.) How can one think of form when content itself is so devoid of meaning?
Mostly a’s – The postmodernist: You shun the idea of any absolute truth. You like to subvert existing theories or ideas about things.
Mostly b’s – The feminist: You are constantly trying to dismantle the literary patriarchy. You might worship dark female poets like Sylvia Plath but you still have a soft spot for Jane Austen.
Mostly c’s – The intellectual: You pride yourself on your intellect and your vast knowledge of literature. You have been known to correct other’s people grammar and recite poetry at parties.
Mostly d’s – The existentialist: You like to live in the moment. You constantly question the meaninglessness of life. Material things are of little significance to you.