The World Rolls On!

1 June 2016

OLYMPUS DIGITAL CAMERA Dateline:  Hill of Three Oaks (May 31, 2016)

The English department gathered for its annual “Seniors Vs. the World” softball game this evening.  Despite rainfall earlier in the day and lowering skies all the way up until game-time, the skies parted and the sun broke through the clouds for this year’s epic contest.  The softball game, has by tradition, been a post-prandial affair.  But the World is changing and the English department right along with it.  So when the department proved to be insufficiently inflammatory, at least in the realm of the barbeque (Grillmaster and outgoing Chair Tim Raylor’s ingenious cardboard “chimney” attracted a great deal of attention but shed more light than heat), it was decided that the game would be played before dinner on the rain-freshened greensward beneath the Hill.  In an intriguing game that featured a valiant comeback by the Class of 2016, the World emerged triumphant for the second year in a row, with a final score of 13-10.

After a rousing Shakespearean group huddle (inspired by Lexi Norvet’s smartphone), the Seniors, many of whom sported their new “Laird 16” teeshirts, came to bat first, full of enthusiasm and ready to take on the World.  Alex Caulfield was first up and immediately hit an admirable single.  Sami Saltzman then hit a fly ball but Justice TenEyck make an athletic catch and posted the first out of the game.  (TenEyck’s tenacious play would prove a thorn in the Seniors’ side all game, as he remained unfazed by Senior taunts such as, “Justice, you ain’t got nothing but . . . Justice”).  Lexi Norvet, Maddie Horn, Grace Black and Kristen Nassar all had creditable at-bats, but Greg Smith displayed remarkable athleticism in catching a fly ball for the World, for a third out, and the Seniors were forced to take the field.   The World trembled as the Seniors arrayed themselves in magnificent profusion, with over a dozen outfielders at one point.  Junior hitter Eli Sorich, however, was undaunted.  Eli, who insouciantly batted one-handed, sent a high-flying hit to center field good for a double.  Two plays later he astonished the crowd by sliding into home in a shower of grass and dirt and unrhymed iambic pentameters.  It was clear that the World had come to play.  Leah Roche and Mike Hellman added two more runs and the inning ended with the score 3-1, in favor of the World.

In the second inning the Seniors started to take full advantage of the tennis racquet and turned some heads with big hits but they only managed to tack on a single run.  One highlight featured a line-drive that blasted through Field Marshall Arnab Chakladar’s outstretched hands.  “Wow,” one Senior marveled, “that went right through Arnab’s hands.”  “Like life itself,” Arnab said, with a whiff of chagrin.  Wren Wells, Wilson Josephson, and Noah Bunnell all acquitted themselves well at bat but the Seniors visibly wilted when Noah’s pop-up foul was caught one-handed by World catcher Pierre Hecker for the final out.  “Fair is foul, and foul is fair,” Herr Hecker noted impressively.  The Seniors took the field once again, down 3-2.  The World, no doubt heartened by Pierre’s catch, then proceeded to blow the game open with an offensive barrage that featured hits by Justice, Arnab, Pistol Pete Balaam, Greg Smith, and the unstoppable Mike Hellman and Leah Roche.  Joe Brommel smashed out a high sub-orbital triple to finish up the inning.  When the dust settled the score was the World 11, Seniors 2.

The Seniors were in disarray, but Sami Saltzman tried to rally the troops.  (“Much as I hate the World,” she conceded, “they’re pretty good.”)  Mikayla Coulombe, Jeong Lim, Peter Alexander, and Josh Wickert all batted for the Seniors but could add on only a single run.  Good defense on the part of the Seniors, however, kept the World from scoring in the bottom of the third.   And then, at the start of the 4th inning, the Seniors finally found their groove and made a gallant, furious comeback.  Sam Chao hit a high-arcing double; Wilson Josephson smacked a hit into center field; and Noah Bunnell and Sarah Meister both spoke softly and carried a big bat.  Six runs were scored by the Seniors and the score was 11-8 when the World came up to bat.  Lexi Norvet had a short-lived but glorious stint as a Senior pitcher, even though Arnab was impatient.  “C’mon Lexi!  There are no warmups in life,” he noted.  The World added two more runs to end the 4th inning with the score 13-8.

In the 5th and final inning, the Seniors valiantly tried to pull the game out and added two more runs.  But with two outs, Knight Errant Peter Alexander’s line drive was caught in mid-air (a heroic and fitting finish to his Carleton career) and the game was over, 13-10 in favor of the World.  Both teams formed two lines to shake hands in a show of good sportsmanship and headed up the hill, where Tim Raylor and Will Clapp now had plates piled with freshly cooked hamburgers and veggie burgers ready and waiting.

The evening ended with a touching encomium by Pete Balaam for departing Chair Raylor, followed by Three Cheers for Tim (who looked smashing in yellow shorts).   And so the glory that was this year’s picnic ended, with ice cubes melting on the grill and all seeming right with the world.   Most importantly, the Seniors left holding their heads high.  For while they didn’t manage to win this year’s game, they did show that they are fully capable of giving the World just about all it can handle.

Your humble scribe,

Mike Kowalewski

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Comments

  • 2016-06-01 13:40:36
    Judy Lichterman Monn '74

    Thank goodness this is a tradition that post-dates my year as a senior English major.