Class: 2023
Major: Sociology/Anthropology, Spanish, Gender, Women's & Sexuality Studies
Residence: Chicago, IL
Deceased: April 11, 2025
Class: 2023
Major: Sociology/Anthropology, Spanish, Gender, Women's & Sexuality Studies
Residence: Chicago, IL
Deceased: April 11, 2025
Comments
I wasn't close to Joe, but their enthusiasm and positivity that shed from the small encounters that I had with them across campus when I was an underclassman were to be remembered. I wish you well, Joe.
I remember multiple, wonderful conversations with Joe so fondly...they were full of curiosity and insight and their memory will live in my heart. My deepest sympathies go out to Joe's family and other loved ones.
Joe encouraged me to join the Carleton drag show and helped me put together my act. Without them, I would doubtless not be as involved with the LGBT community on campus, and I wouldn't have so many excellent friends. The world needs people like Joe, and it was so much brighter for their presence, even if for too short a time.
They were my peer leader. The first friendly face to receive me here. I don't know where I would be without their kindness. I've always regretted I couldn't know them better. I can't claim to have known them well, but they gave me so much support. They meant so much to me, and now I'm silently horrified that I never said how much for fear of being weird. They were a natural performer, an excellent performer. Their skills with makeup were fabulous, and they wore impressive heels. I want to try to remember that. I want that to be what I remember, for the happiness I then saw in them. Cold comfort it is that at least we will continue to enjoy their legacy in the form of the drag show. I hope that even years later students will still know Joe's name. They were great, one of the best people you could hope to meet. They deserve to be remembered.
the last conversation i had with Joe, they typed my name out. even after graduating two whole years prior and only knowing me for one, they still spelled it with two Ns, a detail that some people that have known me my whole life sometimes forget. they are a shining star in morality, love and strength, and a worthy role model for every single person i know.
I did tech for Carleton's A Drag a couple times, and Joe always treated me, and the people I worked with, with the utmost kindness and respect, even at a time when I didn't think I deserved it. I always thought it was so... cool - feels like such a weak word, but it's the one I have - the outward they commanded the stage, the crowd, themself with. It was magnificent, and really inspiring. Thank you, Joe, for truly teaching me how to serve, and a lot more besides.
As I sit in the libe, what I remember best about Joe is when we had both been studying separately in the libe, but heard the rain, and decided to stand outside under the libe's entrance to listen to it for a bit and chat. Joe told me about their comps project and assuaged my fears about my future comps (years in advance). That conversation struck me because their passion for the subject clearly shone through, making me excited for my senior year at Carleton, to find and share my own passions. We were not necessarily friends, but Joe would still wave excitedly at me, even across the bald spot, which felt really supportive and comforting when I was an underclassman. I loved the conversations that we got to have, and mourn the loss of a great person.
I looked up to Joe as a co-worker and as a classmate. We weren't ever close, but seeing the confidence and brightness with which they conducted themselves is something that I will always remember. At some of the times I was feeling the worst about myself and my place at Carleton, Joe was always someone who reminded me of what it could mean to live life deeply and meaningfully
I will forever remember the way that Joe lit up campus my first year as a freshman. How on Halloween they went to the dining hall and classes as a hot dog in fishnets. Their drag performances as DÜSH were the stuff of legends, and their creativity knew no bounds.
Joe was unabashedly themself. And in one of the first interviews I ever did for the Carletonian, they encouraged me to as well. I left feeling prouder of my queerness and myself. I know we never spoke much after that interview, but I’ll always remember the smile they’d cast my way. They are so, so missed.
Joe, you were (are) such a shining light for so many of us, whether your fellow students, staff, community members, or faculty. Your way of being in the world with others was so refreshing--honest and caring, and wicked smart. I remember your paper from the first fall of the Covid-19 pandemic, how you combined your incisive intellect with empathy, focusing on the creation of trust when using telehealth. And in senior year, your beautiful, artful make-up, giving and receiving compliments, and what a great peer editor you were. Wherever you are now, dear Joe, take it easy, but take it.
To Joe's parents, be proud of your child, so loved by many, and be patient with yourselves with the ups and downs and surprises of grief. Losing a child--at any age--is so painful and so hard for others to understand. We'd all rather skip the tenth plague. My heart goes out to you.
Joe is a marvelously difficult person to describe, for they are, in essence, pure light. And yet, even that metaphor falls short of capturing the depth of their intellect and the radiance of their presence. Engaging with Joe often felt like watching light refract through a prism—each conversation unfolding into a cascade of vivid colors, each hue revealing a facet of their passions and mind: anthropology, the Spanish-speaking world, fashion, activism, and the nuanced entanglements of confidence.
I had the privilege of speaking with Joe many times, and our conversations wandered widely. Yet one moment remains especially poignant—the ethnographic elegance with which they spoke about their work at a queer magazine during their time living in Madrid. That chapter of their life, as they described it, was both affirming and disorienting. Immersed in a newfound community that often dissolved the moment they stepped back onto the streets, Joe navigated the fragility and beauty of belonging with striking clarity and insight. They did not recount this period solely as a challenge, but rather as a profound lesson in the art of inhabiting multiple worlds—and in doing so, finding the grace to move between them with dignity, compassion, and joy.
Joe is, and will remain, a light—one that continues to shine on the paths of those fortunate enough to know them.
Note: I purposely wrote in presente continuo...
Joe, it is still difficult for me to grasp the fact that you are gone, but I will forever cherish the memories that we shared with one another over the past few years. From being one of my first friends at Carleton when we met at the second accepted students weekend to encouraging me to be a part of the Carleton Drag Shows, I will carry these memories with me.
It's been an absolute honor to be young, wild, and queer with you, and I am very grateful and appreciative of the love and kindness in our friendship. If there is truly a next life, I hope I get to be your friend again.
My radiant friend. Love you, miss you. You will always be part of me.
My time at Carleton and Joe’s only overlapped for a short time, but they will always stand out as a bright and wonderful spirit, something that the world needs more of. I know that Joe’s positivity and warmth will live on forever, and I hope we can all be more like them. You will be very missed.
I studied abroad with Joe on the Madrid program with Palmar in 2021. During that time, I really enjoyed Joe’s company, their infectious spirit, their eagerness to explore, and their loyalty to their friends. I am deeply saddened to hear of this news, but I know that Joe will live on through all the hearts they touched and the minds they uplifted. Te extrañaremos Joe.
Joe, thank you for bringing your sparkle to us in Madrid, in Northfield, and from wherever you are now. I'll always remember the night we tried to go to a talk for what was at the time your ideas of a COMPS, found out you needed to RSVP a week ago, and went for bubble tea instead. All in the pouring rain. That was a beautiful night. Thank you for being you. You will be missed. All my love, Sophie.
I will never forget our walks through Madrid, talking about a million things... Joe is that kind smile every morning; the magical presence on a gray day; a helping hand for anyone, at any moment; the laughter that breaks through tense silence, reminding everyone they still belong; a steady gaze, full of conviction, always ready to fight for what’s fair and just; a loyal voice; a sharp and questioning spirit, always in search of the truth in everything they explored. Gracias por tanto, Joe. Qué hermoso haberme cruzado contigo en este camino que es la vida.
Joe was always incredibly kind and welcome to all. I'm very sad to hear or their passing. They were a ray of sunshine and an incredibly important part of the Carleton community.
Life with Joe was a constant joy. They had such a unique ability to challenge you to be your best, encourage you at your worst, and inject laughter into every moment. Life has a really cruel and unfair way of working sometimes. Joe, your memory is always a blessing. <3
Joe is the kind of person you look back on and are grateful to have met. I remember working with them on tech for the drag show, the last one before they graduated. They did phenomenally, of course -- they've never not, in my opinion -- but I remember leaving Sayles after the show and hearing them shout after me. They thanked me for working tech, and encouraged me to perform next year. I think I brushed it off at the time, being shy, but it was encouragement I needed; drag's become a much larger part in my life, especially at Carleton. I can't begin to express my gratitude towards them for creating the community I'm now a part of, and for just being themselves without reservation, so, just. Thanks Joe. You're missed.
Joe’s generosity, compassion, creativity, and fierceness touched every corner of Carleton. They were a role model for so many, but especially other queer and trans students. I feel so grateful that our paths crossed and I got to know them. May their memory forever be a blessing.
I was not super close to Joe, but knew them enough that we would say hi when we passed each other. They were a great RA my sophomore year and a fun neighbor in Parish.
I loved watching them perform; they were so beautiful and charismatic.
I’m really sad to hear about their passing.
Your enthusiasm for life will be sorely missed.
When I think of the brilliance Joe demonstrated inside and outside of class, I remember their determination to not settle for easy answers. Their ability to sit with emotional discomfort, intellectual complexity and then—miraculously—create something subversive, poignant, and beautiful, is unforgettable. Those memories will continue to be blessings.
I met Joe as a freshman when I worked at the GSC. They were someone I looked up to, and even though I was too nervous to talk to them, they talked to me and made me feel good. They brought so much light to the Carleton community and brought me so much queer joy through their kindness and creativity. I only wish I had been able to spend more time with them.
I met Joe in their first year at Carleton. Joe was a stellar student with a kind heart. Joe worked with a struggling student in the class, and together they made a brilliant team. I last saw Joe at graduation, when I met their parents. It was a happy day--Joe seemed so buoyant. I will remember him that way.
I met Joe my freshman winter when I attended my first ever drag show, hosted by Carleton's a Drag, a club that they founded that has become a defining part of my Carleton experience. Being part of the drag shows for the past few years has transformed me again and again to confront the endless, equally shapeshifting hardships that life has thrown at me. Even though they had only been with this club for a short time before graduating, Joe's bottomless loving energy is woven deeply into this club, instilling all of us with an attitude larger than life. I don't know where I'd be without it. Somewhere lost, probably, still looking that feeling of belonging. So for that, Joe, I thank you. Thank you. Thank you. Thank you. I am just so grateful to have been touched by an angel like you. Thank you.
I had the incredible honor of being Joe's SOAN advisor and professor. I remember being awed by their deep intellect and joyful embrace of the liberal arts curriculum. It was so easy to get to know Joe; in addition to being down to earth and modest about their accomplishments, Joe had a great sense of humor! When I last saw Joe, at SOAN's Senior Week Department Reception, I was struck by the loving kindness I saw in their family. I extend my most sincere condolences to Joe's parents and brother. May the memories you have of your amazing child and sibling bring you comfort in this difficult time.
Joe was extraordinary. I have vivid memories of Joe from my A&I seminar in the fall of 2019. They brought empathy, brilliance, and courage to discussions and infused our classroom with warmth and the most infectious sense of humor. My deepest sympathies go out to Joe’s family and friends.
My path at Carleton crossed Joe's mostly through Spanish activities: we took Spanish classes together, worked together as Spanish TAs, and both studied abroad in Madrid during our junior year. The Joe I knew was a consistently kind, optimistic, and intelligent person who was unabashedly themself but never at the expense of anyone else. Joe always lifted up others and worked hard to make sure no one was left out.
When we studied abroad in Madrid, I so admired Joe's spirit of exploration as they embraced life in a new city and a new country, and I appreciated that they frequently invited the rest of us to join in on their adventures around the city. One of my favorite moments with Joe during our time in Madrid was when we celebrated the fact that they were able to meet Alaska, one of the top Spanish singers of the 1980's of whom we were both fans, during their post-program internship.
I think I will remember Joe most fondly, however, from the moments when we would run into each other around campus and Joe would unfailingly greet me with a hello, a wave, and a smile, always brightening my day and making me feel that I belonged. I am heartbroken by Joe's passing because they have left us all too soon and the world has been deprived of the immense good they would have surely brought to so many people had they been given more time. However, I hope that Joe's memory will live on through all of the people they have touched through their kindness and generosity. Seeing the outpouring of love in these comments, I know that this will be the case.
I had the incredible privilege of getting to sing with Joe for three years in Exit 69, as well as getting to know them as a friend. Joe was such an incredible, radiant spirit. They brought so much light and love to every room they were in and always went out of their way to make everyone feel welcome, safe and comfortable. Their incredible awareness and kindness made them a fixture on campus. They were so loved here, and there are no words for the impact they had on this community.
Joe, thank you for being such a kind and loving friend, for always being there, for chatting about Drag Race or life with me, for making me laugh, and most of all, for sharing your whole self with the world. I know the world is a better place because you were in it, even for a short time. May your memory be a blessing, and a force.
Joe was one of the first people I met at Carleton through our A&I seminar. They filled me with joy that I got to have classmates as brilliant, thoughtful, hilarious, and kind as them. Throughout our time at Carleton I saw them make an impact on so many communities--Exit 69, Mutual Aid, the SOAN and Spanish departments, and of course drag--and always felt lucky when I got to overlap with them, in however small a way. Watching them come into their (gender)queerness empowered and inspired me as I came into my own.
When we graduated, just knowing Joe was out in the world made it a brighter, more beautiful place, and I always assumed that one day I would be visiting Chicago and I would see them do drag. Words cannot describe the ripples of impact that their loss has and will have. But neither can they capture Joe's ability to bring people together, even now, as we mourn them in community. Rest in power, DÜSH.
This kind of loss is not one I am capable of writing about, so instead I just want to say thank you. Thank you, Joe.
Joe, I miss you so, so much. I’m choked up and crying thinking of you, because of the exuberant and effervescent space you held in this world— in my life, and in so many others’ lives too. I’ve been mourning you and holding you in my heart since I found out about your passing. We haven’t talked in-person in the few years since my graduation in ‘22, however, we kept in-touch via text and socials. Your laughter lit up the world, and spread joy to those around you. I prayed to you before writing this, and I felt like you heard me. I thought we had more time to create more memories in this life. You changed my life for the better; you lived fully and bravely. You helped me feel safe in very unsteady points in my life. I am forever grateful to have met you. I could go on for a very long time, but I will write to you and you will always be in my heart. I love you forever, my dear friend.
Joe was an RA on my staff when I worked as an Area Director. Joe, as many of the 4th Myers students would come to learn, was so positive, thoughtful, kind and caring. Joe also was not afraid to speak their mind, and what impressed me was that when they did speak their mind they did so with an elegance and responsibility that I feel is not common with college students in general.
I’ll never forget when Joe would say “Party” every time they found joy and happiness with good news and the successes of others. Joe truly cared about their people, and Joe’s energy reminded me of the importance and power in positivity even when some days felt impossible.
I will miss you dearly, my friend. I feel honored to have worked with you, and I feel fortunate to have crossed paths with you. Rest in peace, my friend.
It's been 4 months and I still don't know what to say. I miss you, Joe, and I am thinking of you and your family. I miss your smile, your kindness, your singing on stage and in our suite, and of course your incredible drag performances and outfits.
I remember meeting you and your radiant and affectionate smile in Choir freshman winter. I remember when I struggled to find my baritenor part I'd always try to listen and match to your voice. I remember being a little jealous of you when you got into callbacks for acapella and I didn't. I remember our random chats from 4th Myers lounge to Bell field to our James suite. I remember getting all the sneak peeks of your makeup and drag outfits as you prepared for your amazing performances. I remember singing with you at the bathroom mirror, and making arrangements together and singing them during senior week.
Thank you for being such a wonderful friend and roommate. Thank you for bringing joy to everyone around you. Thank you for bringing the best out of everyone around you. Thank you for being a part of my life and I will forever cherish our memories together. I'm so sorry I never visited you in Chicago after we graduated. I am thinking of you and your family and I miss you.