Expectations
In which Greta learns to let go of the perfect college experience during COVID times.
In which Greta learns to let go of the perfect college experience during COVID times.
When applying to colleges the winter of 2017, or accepting and deferring admission at Carleton the spring of 2018, or starting college the fall of 2019, here’s what I did not expect:
- Getting kicked off campus in March 2020
- Taking more classes online than in person during my freshman and sophomore years
- Living through a pandemic… duh
When writing my last blog post, here’s what I did not expect:
- Choosing to stay home for Winter Term 2021
If you haven’t been keeping up with my life (I don’t blame you), here’s a summary of my thoughts last November.
I was just finishing up an in-person/remote term (on Carleton’s campus, but classes online). I’d had a good fall, but I wanted a change for winter, so I accepted a spot living in an interest house called WHOA (Wellstone House of Organizing and Activism). I was super excited for it, and I felt like I had my life all figured out. And then… things changed.
Over the past six weeks, I felt myself settling into life at home. I grew closer with and more grateful for my family than ever.
I savored the natural beauty of my home state.
And I realized I wasn’t ready to leave.
If the pandemic ended today, I’d be chomping at the bit to go back to Carleton and all that I love about the place: late nights at Sayles with my friends, long days in the crowded Libe, roundtable classrooms in Laird and Leighton, concerts at the Cave and the Weitz. But none of that is possible now, and the things that are (rambling the Arb, skating on the Bald Spot, living in WHOA house) all come with the cost of COVID precautions and risk. So I realized, unlike last March or September, I wanted to stay home.
Why am I telling you all this?
a) I don’t post much on Instagram, so I have to overshare somewhere!
b) The pandemic is teaching me a life lesson: it’s okay to change my mind.
Throughout the entire college applications process, I wanted to have a plan. I would choose my dream school, take a gap year, then spend four years there, living the college dream. Maybe I’d throw in a semester abroad, but mostly I’d be at school.
Obviously, that hasn’t panned out. Some of it, like last March, was beyond my control. But this term, I could have chosen to go back. I think high school me would have been shocked that I didn’t. But I’m learning to do what feels right, even if it doesn’t make sense on paper. Even if it changes in a month, or a year, or a day. Do what feels right.
I recognize that I have a lot of privilege: a loving and financially stable family, a beautiful and safe place to live, and more. Without these things, I wouldn’t have the opportunity to do what feels right.
Especially during the pandemic, so many people have only bad options, or no choice at all. If that sounds like you or someone you know, and there’s anything I can do you to help as a humble blogger and someone who cares, please email me: I’m hardyg@carleton.edu.
So now you’re all caught up on my past, but what’s next?
Letting go of being physically at Carleton has freed me up to look forward to virtual school. I’m incredibly excited for all three of my classes: Creative Writing, Intro to Latin American Literature, and Food Anthropology. I have so much to say about why I chose each of them, but you know what? In the spirit of releasing expectations, I’m going to wait to share until after I’ve gone to class.
Greta is a proud Vermonter and Carl who’s getting the best of both worlds by doing school from home. She has weathered the pandemic by writing constantly, playing piano, and spending time outdoors. Then eating lots of chocolate. She wants to learn everything, but she might major in English and minor in Latin American Studies. Meet the other bloggers!